Can we just begin again? I think I screwed it up my friend.........

I know you're probably wondering what this is all about. But I must apologize for my recent behavior.
I'm sure you remember the night, wednesday, the big day.
Afterwards was when it all went down. And when I say down, I mean in terms of the hill.
It all started off well enough, as most things tend to do.
But at the end, I feel I overstepped my bounds, teetering dangerously close to the edge. In hindsight, I think I might have jumped.
I never wanted to be THAT girl. The one who went too far, said too much, did the wrong things at the worst of times.

I became her that night.

And as I saw you standing there today watching your friends, I realized how incredibly wrong I had been in my actions.
My heart sank to my feet and I was saddened at the thought that I may have taken you for granted in a sort of way.

You're only a boy and I'm only a girl. Under different circumstances it wouldn't matter as much as it does. But,we all know it matters greatly.

I don't really know what came over me in that moment. Part of it was the late realization that you were infact leaving. Something I was slow on the uptake with. Or maybe it was the culture shock of being in this town, as it was only my 1st day.

But, I must say thank you for the gracious and kind way you handled the inconvience and took that impromptu snapshot. It truely meant alot.

I don't care what thay all think, in my book, you're alright kid and I will continue to defend you no matter what those people say. You deserve more than this. They all just don't know it.

I must admit though, the photo taken that night is one of the most truthful photos I have ever seen....not only in terms of you, but also with me. It says things to me no one will ever know, mostly things about the people behind those heavy, tired eyes.

So perhaps I'll see you again one day, walking the pup you so fondly spoke of.

Some of me hopes that will happen so I can do this apology in the right way.
Most of me knows it never will, and that's ok.

It's highly doubtful that you are actually reading this, but felt I needed to get it out there.


This is my bottle, I'm thrusting it into the sea.
Only time will tell if it makes it to where it needs to be.