if happy little bluebirds fly..............

I really love it when people fuck up.
Like accidently sending a text to you that's about you.
Really feeling like I have some awesome friends tonight.
Only in a not so awesome sort of way.

Sometimes I really hate being me.

Sometimes I wonder what friendship really even means anymore.

Sometimes I care too much.

Sometimes I just don't care.

Sometimes I wish I were anywhere but here.

Most of the time I wish it were anywhere with you.

the science of me.............

So much to say lately but the words have failed me.

Or maybe I have failed them.

Trying to bring it all around but that's never easy when you're not sure where to begin.
My head and my heart are all sorts of crazy.
It's hard to believe in normal when I don't really know what normal is.

Sometimes I wonder about all of this.
What it means.
What it doesn't.

My head doesn't understand what my heart knows to be true. But it's too stubborn to ever give up trying.

I want to believe in this.
All of it.
None of it.

I want it to be my makebelieve, my reality, my everything.

I wish I knew nothing.

After all, isn't ignorance bliss?